2022 is finally over and we have to make sure that year never happens again. Traditionally, January is the month for New Year’s resolutions. Many make their resolutions on January 1st when they are hung over, sleep-deprived and vaguely embarrassed by things they might or might not have done the night before. This is a mistake. When you look in the mirror on January 1 and see a bedraggled, befuddled, overweight guilty-looking person with circles under your eyes, remember this is not the real you. This is not the time for making sudden life changes. Give it a day or two until you’re feeling sturdier. Acts of penance should always be made from a position of strength.
Take the Middle Ages. Back in the 1300’s, Europe had famines that wiped out half the population, raging fires that leveled whole cites and they had the Black Plague that killed 75-200 million people. Treatments for the disease ranged from applying leaches to dousing themselves with smelly onions to wearing live plucked chickens. Afflicted Europeans assumed they were being punished for their sins and a group called the Flagellants marched around whacking themselves with knotted cords in the hopes the Almighty would notice how sorry they were for being bad and forgive them. Not surprisingly, inflicting additional suffering on themselves did not seem to improve their condition.
New Year’s resolutions ought to make you happy. If resolving to run five miles a day sounds like torture, why not exercise by taking leisurely walks in a beautiful park with someone you love? Diets don’t have to be about deprivation. You don’t have to grind your way through plates of scratchy, tasteless kale if you don’t want to. Make yourself delicious vegetable/fruit smoothies and get all your greens in a glass.
This can be a good time of year to think about simplifying your life. I know a couple who agreed that they would absolutely not acquire anything new unless they first got rid of something of equal or larger size. One day, he told his wife he wanted to buy a big new couch for the living room. She nodded, looking him over thoughtfully. “What are you,” she said, “about 180 pounds?” He decided they didn’t really need a new couch.
It’s not necessary to take New Year’s resolutions so seriously. You can make it a party game. For example, get several friends over and have everybody write down one resolution. Then put them all in a bowl and each draw one out at random, promising to perform the resolution faithfully for a month. You may find that even though it’s not your own resolution, you still end up feeling proud of yourself.
And if you are feeling adventurous, have everyone at the party suggest a resolution for the person sitting next to them—like—“lose 15 pounds”. Or, “donate those old clothes”. Or, “give a compliment every day”. Or, “talk less, listen more.” Come on—it’ll be fun. And, who knows? Maybe it will be the last New Year’s party you will ever go to.
Living in Iowa: New Year’s resolutions don’t have to be painful
January 12, 2023